So Friday night's sleeping performance was most definitely a fluke. A big, fat fluke. Not that I didn't expect that, but it was still hard not to hope that maybe Henry "turned the corner." Alas no, no, no.
I did have a heart to heart with Henry's pediatrician yesterday and I now feel like I have a plan that has been catered to him. I feel the need to write it out, almost like a manifesto or a public declaration of intentions.
The real problem area is sleeping after midnight. Its when all hell breaks loose. The hope is to get him to try and sleep in solid three hour stretches after midnight, which honestly he could have been capable of doing the day he was born, but my man likes to party.
Declaration #1: There will be no more boobs after 7pm, only bottles. Sorry my little man, momma-bonding-time is for the daytime only.
Declaration #2a: When he wakes in the night, he will be given 10 minutes to work it out before we go into his room. If he's still crying after ten minutes, AND its been more than three hours since he last ate he'll get a snack of three ounces and then be put back into his crib. If the bottle doesn't konk him out, he is back on the 10 minute schedule of crying/soothing.
Declaration #2b: The 10 minute crying/soothing schedule is to be implemented if he wakes up before three hours have passed. No bottles before 3 hours.
Declaration #3: Soothing him - for the first hour I will only soothe crib-side and NOT pick him up. If he is still awake after an hour's worth of 10 minute sessions, then I will pick him up and rock him to sleep but try very hard not to hold him for too long. As cold hearted as it sounds we are trying to wean him of his need of me.
That's the plan anyways - sounds so simple when I write it out like that. But oh no, simple it is not.
Allow me to outline our first night on the enforced schedule:
7:45pm - Henry goes to bed and we begin letting him cry in 10 minute shifts (This bedtime is later than usual, mostly because he wasn't showing signs of fatigue like he usually does. He napped pretty well during the day, due to his 4 month shots, so I wasn't too concerned that he was up a little later.) In the past week or so he has not been falling asleep right away like he has in the past, which is part of my frustration of late. It seems like his sleeping patterns have deteriorated.
8:30pm - he FINALLY falls asleep.
Midnight - First waking. Since it had been more than 3 hours since he last ate, I fed him 3 ounces (he doesn't even finish - which tells me he's not really waking because he's hungry.) Henry falls back asleep at 12:30.
2:00am - Second waking - I allow crying in 10 minute shifts.
2:52am - Henry finally falls asleep, which is a shame really because if he had only made it to 3am, I would have fed him. Sorry baby.
Side momma note: The real misery is that because I am fighting this horrible cold I couldn't fall back asleep until 3:30am and then....
4:00am - Third waking. Bottle time, again he doesn't finish - in fact he only has an ounce. He falls asleep at 4:20am.
6:30am - This is the point where I officially can't take it anymore. I pull Henry into bed with me (controversial, I know) and we doze until after 9am. Blissful.
Dear gods of the sleeping babies, please show us improvement tonight. I'm growing fearful that one of these nights I might dissolve into a puddle of ooze right next to our Diaper Champ.
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5 comments:
Keep with it Lauren. God, I remember how hard it was with Caroline when she was about Henry's age and it does get better. Also, don't feel badly about pulling him into bed with you in the early morning like you wrote about here. Those morning naps with her were so precious and you will remember them fondly when he is a bit older and up for the day at 6. =) You are doing an amazing job!!!
I second that! You are an incredible momma. I know this is ridiculously tough, but you will get through it. Jackson too had a rough go early on and every now and then he returns to it just to remind me that he can, but it did get better and it will for you too. And don't ever feel badly for doing what is best for both of you (those morning snugly naps) Keep at it; you're doing a great job!
Lauren,
My sleep deprived friend....are you putting mr. henry down awake at first? sometimes letting him "work it out" for 30 min or so at 8ish is MUCH more bearable than 2am....and you can have a cocktail....just remember he's crying because he's frustrated and he doesn't quite know what he's supposed to do with himself- it's not a reflection on you or that you are being mean to him- although I realize that I can say that now. At the time I was going through this, nothing even remotely convinced me that I was being a good mom by letting Jossie cry!
you guys - thank you so much! I seriously don't know where I would be if I didn't have such a fabulous support system in place. Seriously - "thank you" doesn't even begin to cover it.
Emily - "awake but drowsy" - check!
Good luck, Lauren. Just stick with it-- consistency is key. You are doing a great job.
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